The Bedford Reader
“But What Do You Mean?” by Deborah Tannen

“But What Do You Mean?” by Deborah Tannen is a series of reasonings for why men and when often encounter miscommunications. She is under the impression that man and women communicate badly because they “have different ideas about what’s appropriate… [And they also have] different ways of speaking…women often mistake men’s teasing as genuinely hostile [and] men often mistake women’s mock self-depracation as truly putting themelves down” Tannen includes subtitled sections into her essay all describing actions that lead up to miscommunication between the opposite sex. She expresses this to her audience by providing a series of sample conversations to allow the reader to witness the conversations between male and female. She states, She also incorporates a myriad of anecdotes in order to provide a visual for the reader. Mature men and women would most likely obtain the information in the essay the best because they will take into account the things they that they are guilty of and be able to relate to it best.

Vocabulary:
1. Deprecate: express disapproval

Tone: [ explanatory ]

Rhetorical Terms:
Anecdote : “ For example , a well know columnist once interviewed me …”
Allusion : “ Instead of balancing in the air , she has plopped to the ground, wondering how she got there”
Personification: ‘Trouble talks.’
Figurative language: “It would be easy to assume that Dierdre was insecure, whether she was fishing for a compliment or soliciting a critique.
Sarcasm: “Thanks for nothing.”

Discussion Questions:
Clarification: How do women often feel about the way men address them?
Application: Out of all the bold headings, which one is more common? Why?
Style: Would the author have conveyed the same message with the absence of the subtitles?